Thank you. Heartfelt-style.

I need to say one. more. time. how appreciative I am of all that attended the awareness event at the Kilns last night. How blessed I feel that you took the time to come out and educate yourselves and use the power of your voice to help promote change in this world.

That is beauty.

That is love.

Thank you.

Imagine what Marie-Jeanne, or any of the women from that video would feel if they knew we were watching and crying with them? Hoping to help them? Doing what we can? Her heart would be filled with hope. My hope is that it already is because her story was finally told.

The advocacy team at WRN screened the movie about a week prior to the showing, and we sat around to process and talk and share our hearts afterward about how we can empower you (the attendee) and not leave you feeling hopeless. And so, I felt lead to simply try and encourage those that came to the event. I spent two nights and one afternoon in solitude simply praying and writing and reading different parts of books and the word to find anything to help. Anything to ease the pain from watching such a horrific truth laid out before your eyes.

But when I got up in front of everyone, I felt overwhelmed. I felt lacking. Speaking in front of people isn't that big a deal to me, but you all were different. You were aching and crying and looked hollow with pain, or angry - all of the emotions I saw in front of me were profound. God is stirring something in your hearts. I encourage you one more time to write it down, consistently pray for that, pray for the people, and ask God what justice should look like in your life, because it will most likely be different from the man or woman who sat next to you last night. May God lift your soul, speak to you, and give you the strength to continue to do good.

Life at its _____

You fill in the blank for yourself. For me, I hear a number of words pop into my head to fit that phrase right now, two of which I'll detail out.

"finest"
"most confusing state ever"

Those both apply right now in some way or another. We'll start with the "finest".

I had a three+ hour date with my baby sister yesterday (sheer awesomeness). It's strange calling her my baby sister sometimes because she's married and doing all of these grown up things...and I'm the middle child of the family that lives life one day at a time. (I'm the free-spirited, traveling, seasonal/part-time job-er that volunteers for NPOs and wants to go into missions overseas. I don't think it's what my parents really expected me to turn out like! But I love it and I think they do, too.)

Anyway, as we sat and talked I got to tell her about how completely satisfied I am because of God right now. There is no other source of joy in my life. I realized that I cannot possibly love anyone more, and I am even finding that may be true one day when I get married. I think God intended it that way. God has this plan for my life, and I'm enjoying Him and the daily obedience that comes with that.

At it's finest = God's joy.

"Most confusing state ever"

Obviously the beginning of this blog was the beginning of my journey to Africa and all that God was revealing to me in the process. Well...right now I'm stuck. If you remember, back in June I got to meet the grill of an SUV in a very rude manner. This leaves me in the middle of a settlement process that, as far as I know, keeps me in the US until it's over (pending a final answer from my attorney at the moment). BLAH. Totally not cool.

So I looked God in the face the other day and said, "Now what?" I'm here for who knows how long. Don't get me wrong, I adore Bend. My family (immediate and my church) is here. My friends and my life are here. So, as I'm "stuck" I find myself asking God daily, "What's on the agenda today?" I wonder, how can I be obedient to Him in every moment of my life, while still exuding social justice, advocating and doing ministry? What does He want me to do here now that there's no "end date" to my time in the US.

Even though this "roadblock" is confusing, it's beautiful to me. I feel God is revealing this secret to me, this wonderful adventure in this one little place on earth. I see opportunities in ministry coming about, opportunities to learn (potentially going back to school on a part time basis...if I can find the funds for it), and so much more.

Yes, life is confusing in that things aren't turning out how I expected thus far, but life is so abundant in lessons and beauty I cannot begin to recount them here for it would take far too long.

Hebrews 10:19-25 is my current favorite encouragement. Take a gander at it.